• Dr. Seima Diaz

Your Smartphone and Mindless Parenting

Updated: Aug 26, 2018

Is your smartphone making you a mindless parent?


Sure, your cellphone is a great tool in managing your life, but I think we are all guilty of using it to shop, check scores, and watch that video our friend just posted a little too much.


Sadly many parents are aware of how distracted they are but can't take the steps to make a change.

Children are left feeling ignored and unworthy when we place them second to our internet feeds.

Without a doubt, then begin to act out because that is the behavior that actually gets their parents to lift their heads up and pay attention. And for a child (and sometimes even adults) negative attention is better than no attention. As if that wasn't sad enough, parents who go from being distracted straight into disciplining tend to use a more harsher form of punishment.


Countertransference anyone?


We all know that excess screen time is not only damaging to our little ones but also to ourselves?


So why the numbing internet scrolling addiction?


Being distracted is often a lot easier than dealing with our emotions in the present moment. Just like using a drug or alcohol, this cell phone addiction is an escape from whatever it is that weighs heavenly on us. Work stress, financial stress, relationship stress... You get the picture.


So enough talking about the problem and let's go over some actions plans to move toward a positive change.


Here are six things that can help you correct course and focus on the relationships that truly matter.


1. Establish technology free times at home. Like, no technology during meal times or after 6pm.


2. Limit the times you check you phone throughout the day. One time per hour should be plenty to keep up and manage your life.


3. Don't use your phone during social interactions. Posting that selfie can surly wait. Don't be so busy sharing your story that you're not present in your own experience.


4. Allow yourself a social media or entertainment binge once a day, like at night while winding down, instead of checking it throughout your day. I promise you, you're missing more right in front of you that what your phone has to offer.


5. Leave your phone in one place, like in your room, or in your desk drawer rather than carrying it around with you 24/7. Think of all of the extra damaging frequencies we are ingesting just by having these devices attached to our hips.


6. Instead of using your phone to kill time when bored or waiting, take the opportunity to meditate or do deep breathing exercises. You'll be surprised how your world will turn around after a few deep breaths or moments of focused concentration.


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Dr. Seima Diaz, Ed.D, LMFT #89056

2018 All Rights Reserved

714.803.5144